A few weeks ago I couldn't fall asleep. I couldn't fall asleep because it all of a sudden hit me that Cambri was about to turn one. That meant before I knew she would be 7 almost 8. When you are almost 8 then you are almost 16, and when you are almost 16 you are almost an adult, married with children of your own and I am a grandma. I know it seems a bit over exaggerated but that night that is how I felt. I remembered being younger and wishing I could grow up faster. I remembered my Mom (Val) told me not to rush because when you do grow up life just rushes by too fast. I didn't believe her then, but now I understand what she was talking about. That night I wrote a letter to Cambri for her first birthday, and once it was written I was able to get some sleep. I guess it helped me realize that though time speeds by now that I am an adult, there is still tons of time to make lots of memories with both of my children because life isn't speeding by for them yet. We have time to make memories that they will remember when they are adults that they can share with their children, and the ones they don't remember we can share for them. So here is the letter I wrote...
Cambri,
I remember this day last year like it was yesterday. It was one of the most exhausting, exciting, painful,scary, happiest days of my life. I had only had this overwhelming sense of emotion once before and that was when I had your older sister Bella. I went to the doctor yesterday afternoon a year ago for my weekly check up. The doctor told me that I was already dilated to 4cm and would have the baby Friday. It was Tuesday. I remember your Dad and I looked at each other and then he said "yeah she will, because she is scheduled to be induced Friday." We left excited, we knew you were coming maybe sooner rather than later. Your due date however wasn't for another 10 days, and since my labor with your sister was induced the day after her due date I didn't get my hopes up that you would come on your own. That night the Braxton Hicks contractions kicked in. To me it didn't mean anything. I had had these contractions daily since I was 13 weeks pregnant with you, but the next morning when they hadn't stopped I thought maybe this is it. I still didn't get my hopes up though because I had these contractions for two days straight when I was pregnant with your sister. With her they were evenly spaced (about 10 minutes apart) and strong enough that when I got induced they said I was already in labor. I figured it would be the same with you. However there were tell tale signs that morning that that may not be the case. To spare the gruesome details and public audience I will keep that for a later date. However I did call your Dad and tell him I think today may be the day. It was march 30, 2011 only 9 days from your due date.
It seemed then that I had flashed forward in time. That nine months couldn't have gone by so quickly. Wasn't it just last August that I left a note for your Dad and a positive pregnancy test telling him I was pregnant. There was still so much to do, nine months wasn't enough time, so I got to cleaning. Dishes, laundry, vacuuming, and to be honest a little Guitar Hero (because who knew when I would get the chance to play again.) By this time the Braxton Hicks had stopped, so I decided I was wrong and you weren't coming today. I laid down to take a nap. Because I had been up all night with those contractions, and up all morning cleaning afraid today was the day, I was tired. Not more than 30 minutes later the contractions started, and I mean really started. They say it's not like in the movies, you don't just know that it's time, but I knew. However I was in denial, your due date wasn't for 9 more days and I wasn't scheduled to be induced for 2 more. I tried to pretend it wasn't happening. I took a shower, helped Bella do her homework, did my hair and make up, just to take my mind off it. I finally decided I should start counting the time between contractions. I was at 5 or so minutes apart by the time your Dad got home from work, and he didn't give me a choice he said "call the doctor." When I called they told me I could probably wait a little longer, but we decided against it. We took Bella to a friends, called friends and family and headed to the hospital.
We got there and checked in by 7:20pm, my contractions then were less than 2 minutes apart. At 9:20pm you were born. There was no time for drugs, no time to relax, no time for anything but to breathe and push. I remember your Dad turned basketball on TV but neither of really got to watch the game. When you were born, all the fear, the worry, the pain, the exhaustion rushed away. I could only feel happiness and excitement to hold my baby girl in my arms for the first time. For nine months I had waited for this moment, and though earlier it seemed it came too soon, I was glad it was finally here.
You were beautiful, you still are, inside and out. You amaze me everyday. You had your personality already established inside the womb. Active, stubborn, funny, just to name a few traits. Inside you would do flips all day, kick me in the ribs, I swear you never stopped moving. I told my doctor repeatedly I didn't know when you slept. Once here you rarely napped, you still wake through out the night, instead of flips you now try to stand on your head, you climb, you push the kitchen table and chairs around, you still never stop moving. You are you. You keep me on my toes because you are into everything and I love it. I still can't believe a year has gone by, and I only know more years are to come, too soon. Before I know it you will be married with children of your own. If I have one piece of advice for your future baby girl it's enjoy every moment and never stop being you, because you are one of the greatest things that has ever happened to me, and I can only hope you share that greatness with others. I love you and happy first birthday.
Cambri,
I remember this day last year like it was yesterday. It was one of the most exhausting, exciting, painful,scary, happiest days of my life. I had only had this overwhelming sense of emotion once before and that was when I had your older sister Bella. I went to the doctor yesterday afternoon a year ago for my weekly check up. The doctor told me that I was already dilated to 4cm and would have the baby Friday. It was Tuesday. I remember your Dad and I looked at each other and then he said "yeah she will, because she is scheduled to be induced Friday." We left excited, we knew you were coming maybe sooner rather than later. Your due date however wasn't for another 10 days, and since my labor with your sister was induced the day after her due date I didn't get my hopes up that you would come on your own. That night the Braxton Hicks contractions kicked in. To me it didn't mean anything. I had had these contractions daily since I was 13 weeks pregnant with you, but the next morning when they hadn't stopped I thought maybe this is it. I still didn't get my hopes up though because I had these contractions for two days straight when I was pregnant with your sister. With her they were evenly spaced (about 10 minutes apart) and strong enough that when I got induced they said I was already in labor. I figured it would be the same with you. However there were tell tale signs that morning that that may not be the case. To spare the gruesome details and public audience I will keep that for a later date. However I did call your Dad and tell him I think today may be the day. It was march 30, 2011 only 9 days from your due date.
It seemed then that I had flashed forward in time. That nine months couldn't have gone by so quickly. Wasn't it just last August that I left a note for your Dad and a positive pregnancy test telling him I was pregnant. There was still so much to do, nine months wasn't enough time, so I got to cleaning. Dishes, laundry, vacuuming, and to be honest a little Guitar Hero (because who knew when I would get the chance to play again.) By this time the Braxton Hicks had stopped, so I decided I was wrong and you weren't coming today. I laid down to take a nap. Because I had been up all night with those contractions, and up all morning cleaning afraid today was the day, I was tired. Not more than 30 minutes later the contractions started, and I mean really started. They say it's not like in the movies, you don't just know that it's time, but I knew. However I was in denial, your due date wasn't for 9 more days and I wasn't scheduled to be induced for 2 more. I tried to pretend it wasn't happening. I took a shower, helped Bella do her homework, did my hair and make up, just to take my mind off it. I finally decided I should start counting the time between contractions. I was at 5 or so minutes apart by the time your Dad got home from work, and he didn't give me a choice he said "call the doctor." When I called they told me I could probably wait a little longer, but we decided against it. We took Bella to a friends, called friends and family and headed to the hospital.
We got there and checked in by 7:20pm, my contractions then were less than 2 minutes apart. At 9:20pm you were born. There was no time for drugs, no time to relax, no time for anything but to breathe and push. I remember your Dad turned basketball on TV but neither of really got to watch the game. When you were born, all the fear, the worry, the pain, the exhaustion rushed away. I could only feel happiness and excitement to hold my baby girl in my arms for the first time. For nine months I had waited for this moment, and though earlier it seemed it came too soon, I was glad it was finally here.
You were beautiful, you still are, inside and out. You amaze me everyday. You had your personality already established inside the womb. Active, stubborn, funny, just to name a few traits. Inside you would do flips all day, kick me in the ribs, I swear you never stopped moving. I told my doctor repeatedly I didn't know when you slept. Once here you rarely napped, you still wake through out the night, instead of flips you now try to stand on your head, you climb, you push the kitchen table and chairs around, you still never stop moving. You are you. You keep me on my toes because you are into everything and I love it. I still can't believe a year has gone by, and I only know more years are to come, too soon. Before I know it you will be married with children of your own. If I have one piece of advice for your future baby girl it's enjoy every moment and never stop being you, because you are one of the greatest things that has ever happened to me, and I can only hope you share that greatness with others. I love you and happy first birthday.
